


can't you see i'm on your side?

by dumbochan



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: ANBU Kuroo, An Attempt at Angst...?, Established Relationship, M/M, Naruto AU, To stay in ANBU or not to stay...that is the question, Will update tags as I go..., but there's a lot of fluff too
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-23
Updated: 2018-11-23
Packaged: 2019-08-28 08:42:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,311
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16720059
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dumbochan/pseuds/dumbochan
Summary: Being a part of the ANBU Black Ops requires a certain kind of shinobi. Not everyone carries the darkness necessary to be in such an elite assassins group, and Kuroo's starting to doubt whether or not he still fits the requirements.





	can't you see i'm on your side?

**Author's Note:**

> I've been working on this forever, and I'm still not done, but I needed to get this out of my face so I can do other things and feel semi-accomplished. 
> 
> title inspired by [losing](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N1-i53r-yVQ) by h.e.r.
> 
> each chapter, will also be inspired by a lyric... because i'm feeling emotional like that lol

Kuroo blended in with the night, like a true ANBU. His mission was over, and he just had to do a quick report to the Hokage, and then he was free to head home. He’s been gone from Karasuno for three weeks now, and he’s dying to sleep in a real bed instead of high in a tree. He also owes someone an apology.

 

This mission was supposed to last a week, maybe 11 days tops, but that obviously didn’t happen. He wonders how his genin team is doing. He left the three of them in Oikawa, a fellow jounin’s, care hoping he didn’t have enough time to taint his precious genin too much. Kuroo can’t help but chuckle to himself, thinking about his three pre-teens and how they think he’s doing an S-rank mission without them.

 

Of course they have no clue that he was in ANBU. No one knows besides the hokage, his ANBU team and well...one other person. That person technically isn’t _supposed_ to know that he’s part of ANBU. They weren’t _supposed_ to find out that he was a squad leader of the elite team, or that he wears the black cat mask, or that he wears black contacts to mask his eye color, and forces his usually unruly hair under a hood. But they did find out and haven’t told anyone yet, so Kuroo’s just going to let it slide. Kuroo should have been a lot better at hiding his ANBU gear from his significant other, but a part of him also wanted to share the secret without having to betray Karasuno and outwardly say it. It was a test almost.

 

He wanted to see if Sawamura was in this for the long haul, just like how he was. If Sawamura could accept that he was ANBU, then there’s a pretty big chance that Sawamura can accept everything Kuroo had to offer him. Kuroo had been given absolutely everything that Sawamura could give him, and it was only fair that he returned the sentiment. It's just a lot easier said than done. 

 

His meeting with the Hokage was brief, mainly because it was late into the night, and Ukai was ready to call it a day and get some rest. He advised Kuroo to do the same.

 

This mission wasn’t particularly hard, Kuroo didn’t have to kill anyone this time, it was just longer than usual, an unnecessary chase that dragged on for no real reason. He and his team have been tracking movement from Nohebi ever since they got wind that they might be up to something unsavory. He was glad to be within his village walls again, and once dismissed by the Hokage, he quickly made his way to the tiny home he shared with Sawamura out on the newer side of town.

  
  


It was a little suburb, a row of houses that all looked alike, all filled with young jounin and chunin that wanted a tiny semblance of normalcy though they all had their own ninja way and path. Kuroo quickly made it to his own place, hiding in the shadows, removing any seals and protective barrier jutsu, and sneaking in through a window. He didn’t ever take anything personal with him on missions, usually leaving his dog tags and keys at home. Sawamura was tucked into bed, covers pulled up to his nose and one ninneko, a cat summon that belonged to Kuroo, curled up around his feet. He carefully closed the window behind him, making sure the curtains were drawn tight, and reinforcing the seals.

 

He felt an immense relief wash over him just watching Sawamura sleep peacefully. There were many reasons why he was ANBU, mostly out of expectation and the need to keep the Kuroo name in good graces, but Sawamura was partly the reason too. He was able to do his part in keeping Karasuno safe, which in turn meant that Sawamura was safe.   

 

After a quick shower and hiding his ANBU gear, Kuroo crawled into bed slowly. He expected Sawamura’s abrupt awakening, and laughed as he was pinned to the bed with a kunai aimed at his throat and a cat hissing and on high alert. Sawamura stared down at him for a second before relaxing, hiding the kunai back under the mattress. “You’re home.” Sawamura sighed out in relief, something Kuroo felt too.

“Yes, thanks for the warm welcome.”

“I felt someone next to me knowing that I went to bed with only a cat in my home. What did you really expect?”

“Instead of a kunai to my throat, maybe a kiss?” Kuroo teased, enjoying how Sawamura was looking at him.

“You’re in a good mood, I’m assuming your mission went well.” Sawamura’s hands began to run through his hair, and Kuroo couldn’t stop the smile spreading on his face.

“Yes, swimmingly.”

“What took you so long?”

“You’re awfully chatty for someone who just woke up from their sleep.”

“An eleven day mission was extended by ten, excuse me for being chatty.”

“It’s a mission you’re not even supposed to be aware of, yet alone aware of a timeline.”

“I have special clearance.”

“You do not.”

“I _should_.”

“Get some sleep… tomorrow, I have a new summon that I want you to meet.”

“ _Boss, you don’t need another summon. Two is enough._ ” Kuroo’s beloved ninneko, Kurumi, stated from where he was curling around Sawamura’s feet, it made Kuroo laugh. Kurumi was his first summon, been with him for the past six years. He had one other named Cinnamon, but she preferred to sleep during the day, and hunt at night.

“You can never have too many cats...though I’m still bummed that I cannot seem to summon dogs. A ninken would be nice.” Kuroo teased, ignoring the hiss from his ninneko.

“You could always summon crows.” Sawamura stated, re-situating himself in bed, using Kuroo’s shoulder as a pillow now.

“I’m not nearly as good at that as you are.”

“You could be if you tried. Hinata would probably like you more.”

“He likes me plenty! I’ll have you know I’m his favorite.”

“After me.”

“Whatever, you were his teacher first, yes, but now he’s a genin and under my care and supervision. Therefore I’m his favorite by default.”

“That’s not how that works.”

“Less talking, more sleeping.”

 

 

When Kuroo woke up the next morning, it was to the smell of food. He opened his eyes to find a plate right in his face, and Sawamura smiling fondly down at him. “Come on, time to wake up and eat. You have three genin ready to see you again.”

“I can be late. Five more minutes please.”

“No.” Sawamura stated, taking a seat at the edge of the bed as Kuroo sat up and stretched his arms before grabbing hold of the tray consisting of rice mixed with natto and topped with a fried egg, grilled fish, and miso soup. It’s been a while since he had a hot meal, his past three weeks spent living on rations. It was greatly appreciated. “No injuries this time? Or are you hiding them well? Do I need to drag Matsukawa here?”

“No need for any medi-nins.” Kuroo stated, holding up a hand, “I’m in perfect health. I didn’t fight nor kill anyone this time.”

“Is that why you’re in such high spirits?”

“What do you mean?”

“Kuroo… I’ve known you long enough to know when a mission has gone good, and when one has gone bad.”

“Oh really? Are you the Kuroo-whisperer now?”

“Pretty much, yes.”

“Well...this one went as good as it can go. Where’s Kurumi?”

“Doing whatever summons do when you don’t need them.”

“Last night, does he always sleep with you like that when I’m gone?”

“Jealous?”

“No, curious.”

“Apparently, when you don’t need him for extended amounts of time, he gets lonely, so at night he’ll stop by for some company. He’s a lot more dependent than Cinnamon, but I think that has more to do with his age.”

“Well… we have a new family member that can help keep him company.”

“And how did we get this new family member?”

“Found him on my mission, and he needed a home. You’re good at adopting strays, so I figured why not.”

“When have I ever adopted a stray? My summons don’t count.”

“You might not outwardly adopt all your Karasuno kids, but you do go out of your way treating them like they’re your own. How many checks have you blown buying them meat buns after class?” Kuroo joked, “Plus, your crows are named after your favorite food: ramen. Miso and Shio totally count as strays.”

“Point taken.” Sawamura stated, stealing a bite of fish. “Hurry and eat so we can see those ‘adopted’ kids of ours, maybe you can introduce them to your new summon.”

“Good idea, maybe they’ll be more excited to train.”

  


Kuroo missed this. He missed Sawamura’s cooking, and having the other eat off his plate, and talk about what pranks his students tried to pull while Kuroo was away. He missed getting dressed in his uniform, helping Sawamura wrap his legs and vice versa. He missed walking to the training grounds to pick up his genin and save them from Oikawa’s guidance. Sawamura tagging along, since the training grounds were on the way to the Academy where he taught a bunch of bratty pre-genin.

 

 

Kuroo’s genin team consisted off Hinata Shouyou, Haiba Lev and Tsukishima Kei. At first, he thought it was just his luck that he was stuck with two overexcited pre-teens and then one that didn’t seem to care about anything. However, after mentoring them for almost a year, he wouldn’t trade them for anyone else (okay, maybe he’d happily trade Lev for So Inuoka, but Reon won’t give him up, he’s already asked twice). His genin were also previous pupils of Sawamura, so Kuroo knows how to wrangle them into submission, thanks to his boyfriend’s expertise. “How’s Hinata doing?” Sawamura questioned during their walk, and Kuroo smiled at him.

“Shrimpy is doing great. Still as bright as the sun, and has boundless amounts of energy.” Kuroo shared, watching Sawamura carefully. The teacher would never outwardly admit it, but Hinata was one of his favorite students, one that he still spoils rotten. Hinata was the smallest kid in his class, yet the one with the biggest dream, to become Hokage. He’s far from ready, but Sawamura has faith that Hinata will accomplish his goal. Kuroo’s proud that he would have had a part in helping make that happen. “Why not come and say hi?”

“I have to get to the Academy, so maybe next time?”

“Oh come on, you’re practically there already.”

“That would involve me actually walking to the training grounds, instead of just passing by like my plan.”

“Fine… I’ll see you after, okay?”

“I work at the missions desk after school, I won’t be home until night.”

“I’ll still see you. It’s not like I have any missions.”

“Don’t speak to soon.”

“I just got off a mission, I doubt I’ll be sent away again so soon.”

“You’re…” Sawamura paused, taking a quick look around, “ANBU...a leader of a squad at that. You don’t get to rest like other jounin.”

“If you want me to stop, I can… I will.”

“No, you won’t. We both know that.” Sawamura explained, “You don’t have to prove anything to me, Kuroo. It’s okay.”

“What’s that supposed to mean? Do you think I’m insinuating that I have something to prove to _you_ of all people?”

“I’m going to overlook your word choice, because you’re about to start a fight that I don’t know if you’re stable enough to have.”

“What?!”

“You need to calm down, I’ll see you back at home tonight.” Sawamura calmly spoke, leaning forward to press a quick kiss to Kuroo’s cheek. “We'll talk later. Goodbye.”

  
  


Kuroo did his best to forget about Sawamura’s words for now and focus on his team. He made his way to training grounds #3, finding them doing target practice with Oikawa and his team. “I hope this means that shrimpy can finally aim a senbon and kunai without the risk of cutting off his own fingers.” Kuroo teased as he leaned against a tree.

“Kuroo-sensei!” Hinata called out, running from where he was throwing targets with one of Oikawa’s students Kageyama. “Sensei! Sensei! How was your mission? Did you fight evil nin?”

“It wasn’t that kind of mission, Shrimpy-chan.” Kuroo teased, patting the very eager and easily excited redhead.

“Welcome back, Kuroo-kun.” Oikawa greeted.

“Thanks, I hope you haven’t tainted my precious genin too much.”

“Of course not, they were, after all, in excellent hands.” Oikawa began, “Not to say that you are an inadequate teacher, but we should do this more often. My genin can help your bunch. My Kunimi-kun and your Megane-kun get along very well. Plus, your Shrimpy’s energy is quite cute.”

“You can’t have my genin, Oikawa, stop trying. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I will be taking them off your hands. Let’s go team.”

 

 

Kuroo couldn’t help but smile, as Hinata began to retell his past couple of weeks without his sensei, and what types of missions the team has done since then. “You’re still one of my favorites sensei, so I’m glad you’re back even if you didn’t take us on your super secret mission.”

“It’s not a secret, it’s just a higher rank than we have clearance for.” Tsukishima stated.

“Kuroo-sensei? Are you allowed to tell us what you did now that it's over?” Lev asked, bouncing on his feet as they walked towards another training ground.

“Mission’s don’t work that way, Lev.” Kuroo laughed, “Aren’t you all just happy that I’m back and alive? That should be enough right?”

“Where’s Sawamura-sensei? Why didn’t you bring him too?” Hinata then questioned, looking around for a sign of the other male.

“He has a class to teach, and you have training to do. If you're good, maybe you can meet my new summons, Azuki. Let’s get started shall we?” The sounds of his team groaning was music to his ears.

 

After training until the kids were too tired to continue, Kuroo decided to reward them with food, taking them out for their favorites. Watching them stuff their faces, filled Kuroo’s heart with joy that he tried to brush off. He wondered if this was the joy parents received when witnessing their children finish a meal. As the kids spoke amongst themselves, talking about whatever fancies twelve year-olds, Kuroo began to think more about himself. The mission was over, and all that was left was to enjoy the bit of freedom he had before he was assigned another. Sawamura feels like he’ll be sent away soon, which is supposed to be absurd, but he had a point. Kuroo is ANBU, a leader of a squad within the Black Ops, and he’s arguably one of the best shinobi in Karasuno. As much as he doesn’t want to be sent away immediately, he’s not going to rule it out. As he watched Hinata complain that Tsukishima doesn’t eat enough like a proper shinobi, his mind drifted back to Sawamura’s early words. ‘You don’t have to prove anything to me, Kuroo’ and ‘’You’re about to start a fight that I don’t know if you’re stable enough to have’ were playing on repeat. He knows he has nothing to prove to Sawamura, but what was with that stable comment? Sure, there are times were missions bring out the worst in him, and it takes weeks for him to mentally recover, but this mission was fine. _He_ was fine. Sawamura is just looking too deeply. There’s nothing wrong with him. He didn't have any blood on his hands, he didn't feel any weird anxiety. He was fine. 

 

 

After making sure all his genin made it home safely, Kuroo began his trek home, taking the long route to enjoy the scenery and beauty that was Karasuno. He remembers moving here with his grandparents and his father during the war. Nekoma was destroyed, and Kuroo was too young to help or do anything really. An entire village was gone, so it was a lot easier to escape than stay and try to survive. Karasuno let them in with open arms, thanks to an alliance that goes back way before Kuroo’s grandparents. His father was a great medinin, but he always working, Kuroo only seeing him for a few hours after school before he was off to work again. It left Kuroo alone a lot, reading with his grandparents and wishing he had more time with his father. He then made friends, and it was a bit easier to cope.

 

He became chunin at thirteen, jounin at fourteen, and ANBU member at seventeen. By his eighteenth birthday, he became leader of a squad. It’s also when he started to date Sawamura. Now, at twenty-four, he was beginning to have thoughts of retirement, at least from ANBU. He wasn’t a huge fan of leading genin teams, until he found his current team, finding enjoyment in mentoring the Karasuno youth. But being in ANBU was dangerous, every mission you danced with death. He’s been stabbed, poisoned, and once put into a coma. He’s been on missions that led to chakra depletion so severe, it took him months to recover. It does get old after a while though, and seeing his fellow shinobi starting lives like regular civilians had him curious.

 

For example, a member of his squad, Iwaizumi has just recently adopted an old student. Kyoutani was thirteen, a great genin, but a troubled youth who became an orphan when his father died during a mission. He looked up to Iwaizumi the most, so it was natural progression that Iwaizumi would take him under his wing. Kuroo remembers asking Iwaizumi why he did that, it had to be hard for a him to take care of a kid half his age, and Iwaizumi replied with “It’s easier to fight if you have something to fight for.”

 

Kuroo has something to fight for. He had all of Karasuno to fight for. He had his genin and their future to fight for. He had Sawamura.

 

 

When he reached home, he decided to sit out on the porch, enjoying the weather instead of sitting inside. He wasn’t surprised to find one of his summons appearing, stretching out lazily at his feet, enjoying a quick nap in the sunshine. “Did you have a good night, Cinnamon?”

_“Yeah… chased rabbits.”_

“Such a good girl, you must be so tired.” Kuroo cooed, reaching down to stroke her fur. “Rest well.”

 

As his cat summons napped, Kuroo absentmindedly continued stroking her fur, his eyes darting back and forth on the empty streets, waiting for something to happen. “Kuroo!!” He turned to the shout of his name, laughing as he saw Bokuto running towards him. “It’s great to see you, man!”

“Yeah, yeah, how have you been?”

“Good! Just passing by. Helped out Ushijima with a mission while you were gone, and now I’m heading back to Fukurodani. I’m glad I got to see you… want to spar?”

“Not today, Bo. I'm a little tired today.”

“Aww… come on! It’s not often when we get to spar! I barely get to see you now, you’re always on missions.”

“I know, but it’s my duty to Karasuno. You, of all people, can understand that.”

“You’re right, but it’s okay to have fun and let loose sometimes! You need breaks! We all do! In fact, why not come to an onsen with me and Asahi! Bring Sawamura and it’d be like a double date!”

“Azumane, huh? So, that’s the real reason why you’ve been passing through Karasuno so often lately? Things are getting serious?”

“Just a little… it’s nice, to be able to come home or look forward to seeing someone after a tough mission. Don’t give me that look! You know what I’m talking about! Do you know how hard it’d be if you didn’t have Sawamura here to come home to after killing someone? Wouldn’t the guilt just eat you alive? Sometimes, it’s hard to remember that we’re human too when our job is to kill or be killed.” Bokuto knew about Kuroo's position in ANBU, because he was part of his own village's ANBU squad. It was amazing how someone as bright, optimistic and playful as Bokuto, could be such a stone cold killer when necessary.

“Yeah...you’re right.” Kuroo stated. This idea has been brought up a lot recently. _“It’s easier to fight if you have something to fight for.”_ Kuroo cleared his throat, “You should head back to Fukurodani, if you make a move now, it won’t be too dark when you get there.”

“You’re right. I’ll see you around, Kuroo!”

“Bye Bo!”

 

Once Bokuto was gone, Kuroo settled back in his seat, thinking. He was happy his friend found someone like Azumane, who happened to be good friends with Sawamura too. Asahi would be the calm to Bokuto’s storm, and Kuroo knows that Bokuto needs it.

 

The sun wasn’t so high up, and the temperature was getting a little cool. Kuroo wouldn’t mind going in for a nap, but it felt like a good idea to just have one right here on the porch. Right as he closed his eyes, he felt a small poke at his chakra, and he opened his eyes to see a fellow Shinobi in front of him. “May I help you?”

“The Hokage has requested to see you.”

“Right now? It can’t wait until later?”

“I’m afraid not.”

“Fine. I’ll meet you there?” With one last coo at a sleeping Cinnamon, Kuroo went through the motions for a teleportation jutsu.

 

 

“You wanted to see me?” Kuroo questioned as he appeared in a cloud of smoke before the Hokage.

Ukai Keishin rolled his eyes, a cigarette pursed between his lips, “Kuroo… you’re being sent on another mission.”

“Already?”

“Nohebi is on the move again. I just need you and your team to tail them to see what they might be up to.”

“You want me to waste time spying on them?”

“You’re not wasting time.”

“Why don’t we just attack and detain? What’s the point in waiting around for them to do something? We already know they're up to no good."

“Because last I checked, you’re not the Hokage. You don’t get to make big decisions like this, Kuroo. I know you have a bone to pick with Daishou, but that bone means jackshit to me. I can’t risk the safety of my village on snakes.”

“So you’re willing to risk ANBU?”

“If that’s not one of the reasons we have ANBU, please enlighten me.”

Kuroo sighed, “When do we move?”

“Midnight.” Ukai answered, "Look, Kuroo... I understand your frustrations...which is why I will give you permission to attack but only if you deem it absolutely necessary. I don't need a war started because you're feeling a little sensitive. Now get out of my office."

 

 

Kuroo transported himself back to his home, where he began to put on his uniform. His uniform consisted of black clothing, a black flak jacket with arm guards and gloves. His shirt had a hood attachment that he used to hide his hair, and as a precaution, he always wore a face mask to cover the lower half of his face up to the nose. Kuroo went to the extremes to even put in colored contacts to mask his hazel eyes. ANBU forces had porcelain masks to wear, but they were conditioned to do whatever means necessary to disguise their appearance, in case the masks were to fail. It was important to keep all missions beyond village walls, and whom was in ANBU, or behind a mask, was to be kept in top secret.

 

However, since Sawamura knew of his ANBU identity, Kuroo didn’t bother putting on his mask yet. Sawamura would be home soon, and Kuroo still had some time before he’d meet with his team for one last briefing with the Hokage. Kuroo began to slowly pack weapons into his jacket when he heard the front door open. He turned to exit the bedroom, making his way down the hall to greet his boyfriend. Sawamura had two bags in his hand, one filled with schoolwork to grade, the other filled with groceries. He also had his two summons Miso and Shio on each shoulder. “Oh hey,I brought….” Sawamura paused, “You’re leaving again?”

“Yeah… you were right.”

“Can you stay for dinner? I’m making curry.”

“I shouldn’t, I have to meet my team.”

“Of course.” Sawamura replied, a small pout on his lips, “Just come home after, okay?”

“I always do.” Kuroo stated, walking over to hug Sawamura, the two crows flying off and perching themselves on the bookshelf.

“Don’t do anything stupid.”

“Don’t let the kids stress you out.”

“Should i tell your genin that you’re on another mission and they are back under Oikawa’s care and attention?”

“Please do.” Kuroo leaned forward, placing a quick kiss against Sawamura's lips, he stepped back, preparing to finish getting ready when Sawamura's hand came up, grasping his jacket and pulling him close once more. 

"Come back to me, please. We have things to clear up still."

"Yeah."

 

 

As Kuroo and his team stayed high into the trees, following a few Nohebi shinobi, a horrible feeling began to stir in Kuroo’s gut. This mission felt off, and he wasn't in as much peace as he was in his previous mission, even if that one went over schedule. 

 

The Nohebi troop stopped to take a rest, and without saying a word, Kuroo lifted his hand, and all of his ANBU squad ceased movement. They stilled, blending in with the night and listening carefully as one of the Nohebi shinobi began to talk to a comrade. Nothing too incriminating was really said, but Kuroo stayed at high alert, saving all the information into some recess of his brain. They would slip soon, they always did. It wasn’t until the mention of a forbidden jutsu that had Kuroo on the edge of a branch, ready to attack.

 

There it was. The word that they shouldn't have uttered, and it all clicked, Nohebi’s plans were now clear. Kuroo was smart enough to piece together what they wanted, and how they planned on getting it, and it disgusted him.

 

Nekoma had some ancient scrolls, passed down from generation to generation, and they were hidden upon the purge of the village. Only two people knew where the scrolls were located, both dead thanks to the purge, meaning those scrolls and their location was dead too. Nohebi planned on using a forbidden jutsu to bring those informants back to life to get their hands on those sacred scrolls. Kuroo was also sure that they weren’t working alone, and were retrieving the scrolls for someone else, probably for money.

 

The Hokage had given Kuroo permission to terminate these shinobi shall Kuroo feel it was necessary, and damn, did he feel it was necessary. He couldn't allow them to use the jutsu to ressurect members of a village that was burned to the ground by war. They deserved peace, and as a Nekoma-born shinobi, Kuroo refused to allow that peace to be disturbed. He signed to his team the plan of attack, looking for any disagreement. When he found none, he turned to Iwaizumi, who quickly planned a strategy for the attack. Kuroo gave the signal, and they dropped from the trees, ready to commit the acts that made them the Black Ops. This felt personal, and it struck a nerve, Kuroo wanting nothing more than to see these Nohebi ninja suffer. Kuroo wasn't too surprised how good it made him feel either. 

 

 

The journey back to Karasuno felt as different as the mission had. There was a humming almost buzzing feeling coursing through Kuroo’s veins. He felt on edge, his eyes were stinging, the contacts feeling dry and causing irritation. He felt dirty though he had no blood on his hands (physical blood, he metaphorically had a lot on his hands) and he couldn’t wait to drown himself in the shower. He dismissed his team, ignoring the squeeze on his shoulder that Iwaizumi gave him and made his way to the Hokage tower to give his report before taking the long route home.

 

 

As expected, Sawamura was asleep, Kurumi once again lounging at his feet. Miso and Shio were also still here, perched on the bed frame and keeping watch. Kuroo stopped and stared into their black eyes for a second. They were watching him carefully, their eyes following his every move. “What?” Kuroo questioned, not understanding the uncertainty. Sawamura sprung up then, kunai in hand and ready to attack. When he saw Kuroo, he immediately relaxed for a half-second before putting his guard back up. “What?” Kuroo questioned again, not liking the look in Sawamura's eyes as he sized him up.

“You’re not out of uniform yet.”

“I just got back. Why are Miso and Shio looking at me like that?”

“Like what?”

“Like I shouldn’t be trusted.”

“You killed someone tonight...more than one person.”

“Three.”

“You...tortured them?”

“Just a little. They deserved it.”

“Miso and Shio can sense it, they’re just looking out for me.”

“I wouldn’t hurt you, they know that. They should know that.”

“It’s just precaution, Kuroo.”

“No… they’re your summons. If they don’t fully trust me, then that means _you_ don’t fully trust me.” The uneasy feeling began to surface again, and Kuroo ground his teeth together.

“It’s late, you need to unwind. I’m not a threat to you.”

“Trust me, I know that.”

“Kuroo… you can relax here, it's okay.”

“What’s your problem?” Kuroo blurted out. His palm began to itch, a habit that starts whenever he felt a fight coming. “What did I do wrong? Ever since yesterday, you’ve been on my case.”

“I’m just looking out for you.”

“Are you? I feel judgement lately, like everything I do, you’re scruitinizing and waiting for me to mess up or snap.”

“It’s just…”

“Just what?”

“You’re ANBU.”

“So? Are you afraid of me? Because I’m ANBU?” Kuroo really wanted to know. Could Sawamura truly handle it?

“Of course I am!” Sawamura admitted, “You come home in the middle of the night, always while I’m sleeping, and nine times out of ten, it’s after you just committed murder. Then you walk around like it doesn’t affect you, which we both know is complete bullshit. You don’t ever admit it to me. So, of course I’m afraid of you.”

“Well, if I’m so terrifying, why don’t you just leave?”

“Excuse me? If it was that easy, I would have been gone. It’s _not_ that easy, Kuroo, and you know it. I love you more than I’m afraid of or intimidated by you, and I want to help you, you just have to allow me to.”

“I don’t need to be fixed.”

“I’m not trying to fix you, I just want to be there to comfort you, and take some of that pressure off of you. Talk to me about it, please.”

“I don’t know if I can.”

“Kuroo, please.” Sawmaura held out his arms, offering comfort to him, but Kuroo couldn’t accept it. Not right now at least. It was clear that Sawamura couldn't handle him being in ANBU, and he needed time to stew over that. 

“I have to go.”

“You can’t just run away from me. This is important.”

“I can’t do this right now, Daichi. I have to go.” With a few quick hand signs, Kuroo was preparing a teleportation jutsu, and he watched Daichi try to lounge at him and stop him before he was whisked away, disappearing behind a gust of wind.

 

 

 

 

 


End file.
